treasured troubles

This is the cry of God,

drawing a mama to His throne,

that she might know He is her everything.

I watched as my friend carried her infant, with her toddler clumsily following along, and her big girl cried at her side. It was one of those kinds of days.

I had lots of those kinds of days when my children were younger.

I wished for a way to help her. I wanted to save her form the exhaustion, the frustration, the grinding down of motherhood.

But then I considered where I might be if someone had rescued me from my days of coming to the brink of collapse.

I wouldn't be sitting here writing this post. I wouldn't know God's love and grace like I do. I wouldn't be able to look at another mom and confidently say, "You will make it because God is with you."

I have had my "It's A Wonderful Life" moment, and I am glad for every time that I felt small, exhausted, and incapable of making it through another day.

Motherhood has taught me that we are all those things; we are all small, exhausted with sin, and without Christ we are incapable of achieving what matters most: living a holy life.

The troubles of today are my treasures. My frustration, my lack of understanding, my impatience, my fears, all remind me that God is bigger and that I need Him.

"But I am like an olive tree flourishing in the house of God; I trust in God's unfailing love forever and ever." -Psalm 52:8

I texted my friend and told her the most important thing any mother needs to hear: It does get better.

And then I looked at my insurmountable mountain of responsibility for the day, and I smiled with gratitude. I don't want someone to take away my challenges. I am right where I need to be.